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Greg's Drinking Song

Greg's Drinking Song
Performer(s): Greg Serrano and The Crew (with Kevin) — First Appearance: "When Will Josh See How Cool I Am?"
Written by: Adam Schlesinger, Jack Dolgen, Rachel BloomGenre: Irish Folk

Quote
Wow, I did not know it was that bad.
EndQuote
— White Josh, "Greg's Drinking Song"


"Greg's Drinking Song" is a musical number performed by Greg Serrano with accompaniment by his friends. In the song he talks about his history of alcoholism and how he is taking steps to overcome his addiction. His crew and even his boss Kevin joins in to remind him of other past drunken incidents which he is unable to recall. The song's first appearance was in the Season Two episode "When Will Josh See How Cool I Am?".

Song and lyricsEdit

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Greg's Drinking Song The CW02:45

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Greg's Drinking Song The CW

Lyrics:

Greg:
Gather ye 'round
And I'll tell you a tale
Of all the great times
I've had with an ale
There's joy and there's glory
More than you can think
Yes this is what happens to me
When I drink!

I pee my pants!
My pants!
I pee my pants!
I get up from the bar
To find pee on my pants!
I say it's water
but all it takes is a glance
For people to realize
I pee my pants!

White Josh:
Wow, I did not know it was that bad.

Greg:
Yes wine can be fun
White, Rosé and Red
'Till I call up my boss
To say I wish he was dead!

Chase down the regret
With some gin for good luck!
Then steal my cousin Jim's
Landscaping truck!

Drive home then
I puke on my cat!
My cat!
I puke on my cat!
I fall through the doorway
And puke on my cat!
Poor little Bruno
Did not expect that!
I tried for the toilet
But puke on my cat!

While some can enjoy
A scotch with a steak
Or one glass of wine
Then they're barely awake.
For me it's much different
What happens when
I try to have one
It just turns into ten.
And then...

I fly a plane!
A plane!
I fly a plane!
I knock on the cockpit
Shouting
"I'll fly this plane!"
We emergency landed
The TSA came
Now I'm banned from Southwest
Cause I try to fly planes!

EVERYBODY!

Everyone:
He has sex with a bush!
A bush!
He has sex with a bush!

Greg:
That wasn't a woman?

Everyone:
No it was a bush!
It had twigs and leaves
Cause it was a bush!

Greg:
That's where that scar comes from!

Everyone:
From sexing a bush!

But he's breaking the cycle
And making a push!
He's quitting his drinking
And saving his
Pants and his
Cat and
Southwest and
Jim's truck

Hector:
And my car

White Josh:
My car too!

Everyone:
And a bush!

Josh:
I didn't do anything wrong! YES!

White Josh:
Again, not about you.


Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Songs
Season 1 Songs

· "Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Theme Song"
· "West Covina (song)"
· "The Sexy Getting Ready Song"
· "I'm So Good At Yoga"
· "Feelin' Kinda Naughty"
· "Face Your Fears"
· "I Have Friends"
· "A Boy Band Made Up of Four Joshes"
· "Settle For Me"

· "Sex with a Stranger"
· "I Love My Daughter"
· "I'm a Good Person"
· "I Give Good Parent"
· "What'll It Be"
· "Sexy French Depression"
· "His Status is...Preferred"
· "Where's the Bathroom?"
· "California Christmastime"
· "Women Gotta Stick Together"
· "Dear Joshua Felix Chan"

· "Having a Few People Over"
· "Put Yourself First"
· "Textmergency"
· "Where Is The Rock?"
· "You Stupid Bitch"
· "Group Hang"
· "Romantic Moments"
· "Cold Showers"
· "JAP Battle"
· "Flooded with Justice
· "Gettin' Bi"
· "I'm The Villain In My Own Story"

· "Dream Ghost"
· "I Could If I Wanted To"
· "Clean Up on Aisle 4"
· "Heavy Boobs"
· "I Gave You a UTI"
· "Angry Mad"
· "Oh My God I Think I Like You"
· "After Everything I've Done For You (That You Didn't Ask For)"
· "One Indescribable Instant"

Season 2 Songs

· "Just a Girl in Love"
· "Love Kernels"
· "We Should Definitely Not Have Sex Right Now"
· "Maybe This Dream"
· "Greg's Drinking Song"
· "Ping Pong Girl"
· "The Math of Love Triangles"
· "It Was a S*** Show"

· "We Tapped That Ass"
· "Makey Makeover"
· "Thought Bubbles"
· "Triceratops Ballet"
· "Friendtopia"
· "Stuck in the Bathroom"
· "Research Me Obsessively"
· "You Go First"
· "So Maternal"

· "Duh!"
· "Who's The New Guy?"
· "George's Turn"
· "We'll Never Have Problems Again"
· "Remember That We Suffered"
· "Santa Ana Winds"
· "Let's Have Intercourse"

· "You’re My Best Friend (And I Know I’m Not Yours)"
· "Man Nap"
· "(Tell Me I'm Okay) Patrick"
· "Period Sex"
· "What a Rush to Be a Bride"

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Reprises

· "West Covina (I)"
· "West Covina (II)"
· "Settle For Me (I)"
· "Settle For Me (II)"

· "I'm a Good Person (silent)"
· "The Sexy Gonna Do It Song"
· "The Trent Is Getting Ready Song"

· "I Have Friends (reprise)"
· "Flooded with Justice (reprise)

· "I Could If I Wanted To (reprise)"
· "Thought Bubbles (reprise)"
· "Rebecca's Reprise"

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Album Bonus tracks

· "Sex Toys"

· "It's Not Difficult To Define Miss Douche"

· "Santa Ana Winds 6 A.M." (Demo)

· "I'm Just A Girl In Love" (featuring Adam Schlesinger)
CharactersEpisodesLocationsCast

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