The Table was a gift Josh got for Valencia when they moved into an apartment together. He and his crew worked hard to assemble the table only to have their efforts go unappreciated. The table was first seen in the Season One episode "I'm So Happy that Josh is So Happy!".
As Josh and Valencia were moving their things into their new place, she lamented that they didn't have a dining room table yet. Josh decided to do something nice and bought one for Valencia as a housewarming present. He roped his friends into helping him and had Hector, White Josh join him at Greg Serrano's house. Hector balked when he saw the pages of instructions and the others had to convince him to stay. Hours passed as the crew struggled to make any progress which resulted in them all falling asleep during the process.
When they awoke, Josh was in a panic as Valencia had texted him about his whereabouts while they where sleeping. Both Greg and White Josh took the opportunity to try and subtly suggest to Chan that he break up with Valencia. They used the table as a metaphor for Valencia and expressed the dislike they had for her through the table. However, Josh was clueless to what they were trying to say and the conversation itself got derailed by Hector. He interjected a long monologue laced with double entendres supposedly about tandem parking.
When they finally finished putting the table together, Josh brought Valencia over to Greg's house to present it to her. She didn't care for it and stated that the style of table didn't match the decor she wanted for the apartment. Before she left Valencia weakly thanked everyone for their efforts. A disappointed Josh later met up with Rebecca Bunch at Cup of boba for a drink. He showed her a photo of the table he had taken on his phone and asked her if she thought it was a nice table. Rebecca replied it was a perfect table which Josh was grateful to hear ("I'm So Happy That Josh Is So Happy!").
- “Josh, there's still time to bail...on this table I mean. We were friends with you before we even met this table.”— Greg,
- “Uh, the truth is...none of us even really like the current table.”— White Josh
- “I hate this table”— Greg
- “We don't like...um, this table.”— White Josh
- “You're going to ruin your life if you stick with this table.”— Greg
- “Bros before...tables.”— White Josh
- “I think it's a nice thing you're doing. Nicest thing I ever did for a girl was pull out.”— Hector
- “...Hector.”— Greg
- “She has tandem parking. So after I'm there for a while I have to pull out...which is such a pain 'cause it feels so great just to leave it in there. The worst is when it's alternate side of the street parking 'cause then I got to park in the back. I don't get why there's a spot back there. It's so tight...feels more like an exit. So then I'm going front, back, front, back and it's all dirty in the back so when I move it to the front then that gets all dirty. I'm just happy I have a spot at all...'cause I used to have to pay.”— Hector
- “Well...that was edifying.”— Greg
|Food and drink|
Treadmill desk · ADD medication · Marijuana · Triceratops · Butter marketing campaign · Brooch · Balloon · Hacked emails · Key to the City · Table · Dart board · Paula's desk · Rebecca’s file · Dolspirone
Crazy Ex-Girlfriend: Original Television Soundtrack (Season 1 - Vol.1)