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Textmergency

Textmergency
Performer(s): Harry, the Lawyers and the clients. — First Appearance: ""That Text Was Not Meant for Josh!""
Genre: '80s Hair Band


Quote
It’s a textmergency, baby can’t you see. Textmergency, that term just occurred to me. It’s gonna catch on instantly!
EndQuote
— 80's rock singer


"Textmergency" is a song that played as Rebecca raced to Josh Chan's apartment to delete a text she accidentally sent to him. It was first heard in the Season One episode"That Text Was Not Meant for Josh!".

The song with lyricsEdit

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Textmergency The CW03:11

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Textmergency The CW

Lyrics:


Time is running out
You’ve got to act now.
Stay one step ahead
Of that moronic text somehow.

There’s no turning back
Here in the danger zone.
You’ve got to manually delete that text
From that dude’s cell phone!

Thank you, officers!
Good luck, Rebecca!

It’s a textmergency,
Baby can’t you see.
Textmergency,
That term just occurred to me.
It’s gonna catch on instantly!

Wait, what about texttastrophe?
That sounds better to me!
Texttastrophe!
That could really spread virally!
I prefer textmergency.

I accidentally texted my mother-in-law
A picture of my erection.

I once group texted my whole staff
About my yeast infection.

Exactly! It’s so relatable,
that’s why I coined the phrase…
Texttastrophe!
That’s the meme, don’t you agree?

All do respect, Textmergency
is the better term, Miss C.

Hmmm, I wanna go with texttastrophe
I already put it on Urban Dictionary.

You fools!
It doesn’t matter what it’s called.
That’s right, it’s me
The ghost of Steve Jobs.
What matters is that I control
your lives from the grave!
Technology is slowly alienating
everyone from their loved ones
Ha ha ha ha.
And when you send a few words
to the wrong recipient
and it immediately destroys your life,
that’s called a messagepocalypse!

Get out of here, Steve Jobs!

Guys, what about that lawyer chick?
We’ve gotten really off track…

She’s searching for the spare key.
Look under the mat!
It’s clearly hidden in that owl!
Look in that flower pot, hurry!

Hurry up and check that Buddha sconce.
Check the Buddha sconce, check the Buddha sconce!

She did it! Now she can delete the text
She won’t need to come up with a textcuse!
Texplanation!
Textmergency just flows.
No, dude, texttastrophe, it’s what it is.
Dude, she’s totally right.
Text-scuse me!


Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Songs
Season 1 Songs

· "Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Theme Song"
· "West Covina (song)"
· "The Sexy Getting Ready Song"
· "I'm So Good At Yoga"
· "Feelin' Kinda Naughty"
· "Face Your Fears"
· "I Have Friends"
· "A Boy Band Made Up of Four Joshes"
· "Settle For Me"

· "Sex with a Stranger"
· "I Love My Daughter"
· "I'm a Good Person"
· "I Give Good Parent"
· "What'll It Be"
· "Sexy French Depression"
· "His Status is...Preferred"
· "Where's the Bathroom?"
· "California Christmastime"
· "Women Gotta Stick Together"
· "Dear Joshua Felix Chan"

· "Having a Few People Over"
· "Put Yourself First"
· "Textmergency"
· "Where Is The Rock?"
· "You Stupid Bitch"
· "Group Hang"
· "Romantic Moments"
· "Cold Showers"
· "JAP Battle"
· "Flooded with Justice
· "Gettin' Bi"
· "I'm The Villain In My Own Story"

· "Dream Ghost"
· "I Could If I Wanted To"
· "Clean Up on Aisle 4"
· "Heavy Boobs"
· "I Gave You a UTI"
· "Angry Mad"
· "Oh My God I Think I Like You"
· "After Everything I've Done For You (That You Didn't Ask For)"
· "One Indescribable Instant"

Season 2 Songs

· "Just a Girl in Love"
· "Love Kernels"
· "We Should Definitely Not Have Sex Right Now"
· "Maybe This Dream"
· "Greg's Drinking Song"
· "Ping Pong Girl"
· "The Math of Love Triangles"
· "It Was a S*** Show"

· "We Tapped That Ass"
· "Makey Makeover"
· "Thought Bubbles"
· "Triceratops Ballet"
· "Friendtopia"
· "Stuck in the Bathroom"
· "Research Me Obsessively"
· "You Go First"
· "So Maternal"

· "Duh!"
· "Who's The New Guy?"
· "George's Turn"
· "We'll Never Have Problems Again"
· "Remember That We Suffered"
· "Santa Ana Winds"
· "Let's Have Intercourse"

· "You’re My Best Friend (And I Know I’m Not Yours)"
· "Man Nap"
· "(Tell Me I'm Okay) Patrick"
· "Period Sex"
· "What a Rush to Be a Bride"

Season 3 Songs

· "Where's Rebecca Bunch?"
· "Let's Generalize About Men"
·The Buzzing From the Bathroom
·Head in the Clouds

· TBA

·TBA

· TBA

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Reprises

· "West Covina (I)"
· "West Covina (II)"
· "Settle For Me (I)"
· "Settle For Me (II)"

· "I'm a Good Person (silent)"
· "The Sexy Gonna Do It Song"
· "The Trent Is Getting Ready Song"

· "I Have Friends (reprise)"
· "Flooded with Justice (reprise)

· "I Could If I Wanted To (reprise)"
· "Thought Bubbles (reprise)"
· "The Math of Love Triangles (reprise)"
· "Rebecca's Reprise"

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Album Bonus tracks

· "Sex Toys"

· "It's Not Difficult To Define Miss Douche"

· "Santa Ana Winds 6 A.M." (Demo)

· "I'm Just A Girl In Love" (featuring Adam Schlesinger)
CharactersEpisodesLocationsCast

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